Computing Jokes, Funny Jokes
Computing Jokes
| # | Title | Hits | Rating |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | If Hewlett-Packard ran Christmas... - |They would market the Reverse Polish Ornament, which is put in your attic on the weekend after Than...Read the whole joke |
128 |  |
| 2 | If the NSA ran Christmas... - |Your ornaments would have a secret trap door that only the NSA could access in case they needed to ...Read the whole joke |
84 | |
| 3 | If The Rand Corporation ran Christmas... - |The ornaments would be large perfectly smooth and seamless black cubes. Christmas morning there wou...Read the whole joke |
78 | |
| 4 | If Fisher Price ran Christmas... - |"Baby's First Ornament" would have a hand-crank that you turn to hang the thing on the tree....Read the whole joke |
88 | |
| 5 | If Dell ran Christmas... - |Wait a minute? Isn't IBM running this Christmas..?...Read the whole joke |
105 | |
| 6 | If Silicon Graphics ran Christmas... - |Ornaments would be priced slightly higher, but would hang on the tree remarkably quickly. Also the ...Read the whole joke |
85 | |
| 7 | If Apple ran Christmas... - |It would do everything the Microsoft ornaments do, but years earlier, and with a smaller mouse (not...Read the whole joke |
71 | |
| 8 | If Microsoft ran Christmas... - |Each time you bought an ornament, you would have to buy a tree as well. You wouldn't have to take t...Read the whole joke |
80 | |
| 9 | If IBM ran Christmas... - |They would want one big Santa, dressed in blue, where kids queue up for their present-processing. R...Read the whole joke |
90 | |
| 10 | Programming language acronyms - |ADA: A Dumb ArrangementADA: A Dumb AcronymADA: A Dumb AnnoyanceBASIC: Boring And Shamelessly Idioti...Read the whole joke |
99 | |
| 11 | The Ten Commandments for C Programmers - |1. Thou shalt run lint frequently and study its pronouncements with care, for verily its perception...Read the whole joke |
78 | |
| 12 | New Microsoft Windows advertising slogans - |At the time of writing, Microsoft's slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?" Thes...Read the whole joke |
96 | |
| 13 | Architect programmer - |If architects had to work like programmers . . .Dear Mr. Architect,Please design and build me a hou...Read the whole joke |
85 | |
| 14 | Computer help stories - |AUSTIN, Texas - The exasperated help-line caller said she couldn't get her new Dell computer to tur...Read the whole joke |
85 | |
| 15 | Possible IBM acronyms - |IBM: It's Being MendedIBM: Inmense Ball of MuckIBM: I Believe in MemorexIBM: It's Better than Macin...Read the whole joke |
110 | |
| 16 | Emacs acronyms - |EMACS: Escape-Meta-Alt-Control-ShiftEMACS: Eight Megabytes And Constantly SwappingEMACS: Even a Mas...Read the whole joke |
80 | |
| 17 | Twas the night before crisis - |Twas the night before crisis,And all through the house,Not a program was working,Not even a browse....Read the whole joke |
80 | |
| 18 | How to shoot yourself in the foot - |Assembler: You shoot yourself in the foot.Ada: The Department of Defense shoots you in the foot aft...Read the whole joke |
90 | |
| 19 | Hacker syndrome - |There is some compelling force in all Hackers that seems to draw them to their computers every day....Read the whole joke |
76 | |
| 20 | Girlfriend 1.0 software - |Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriendPlus1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee1.0)....Read the whole joke |
64 | |
| 21 | Software development cycle - |1. Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.2. Product is tested. 20 bugs are found. 3. Pro...Read the whole joke |
83 | |
| 22 | Confusion about Y2K - |Dear Boss,I hope I haven't misunderstood your instructions. Because to be honest, boss, none of thi...Read the whole joke |
101 | |
| 23 | Great news for Bill Gates - |Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin, and Bill Gates were called in by God. God informed them that he was ve...Read the whole joke |
73 | |
| 24 | Husband 1.0 - |Last year a friend of mine upgraded from BoyFriend 1.0 to Husband 1.0 and found that it's a memory ...Read the whole joke |
166 | |
| 25 | Alice is in UNIX land - |"Can you help me? asked Alice."No," said Negative. "I'm looking for a white consultant." Alice poin...Read the whole joke |
74 | |
| 26 | Car break trouble - | Software Engineer, a Hardware Engineer and a Branch Manager were on their way to a meeting. They w...Read the whole joke |
92 | |
| 27 | why the television is better than the World Wide Web - |10. It doesn't take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels.9. When was the last t...Read the whole joke |
73 | |
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Popular Computing Jokes
| # | Title | Category | Hits | Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Life cycle of software - |The Life Cycle of SoftwareProgrammer produces code he believes is bug-free. Product is tested. 20 b...Read the whole joke |
Computing Jokes | 279 | |
| 2 | Ode to spell checkers - |ODE TO A SPELL CHECKERby Jerrold H ZarI have a spelling checker.It came with my PC.It plane lee mar...Read the whole joke |
Computing Jokes | 256 | |
| 3 | Definition of Windows - |Webster's Dictionary definition of Windows 95Windows95: n. 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell ...Read the whole joke |
Computing Jokes | 222 | |
| 4 | Would you define OCR? - |OCR - Optical Character RecognitionA technology that can take written words and convert them back i...Read the whole joke |
Computing Jokes | 216 | |
| 5 | Computer acronyms list - |Humorous Computer-Related AcronymsIBM I Blame Microsoft Idiots Buy Me Idiots Building Machines I'll...Read the whole joke |
Computing Jokes | 213 | |