Instrument Jokes, Funny Jokes


Instrument Jokes

# Title Hits Rating
1 George Bernard Shaw
- |While at a concert being performed by a very bad orchestra, George Bernard Shaw was asked what he'd...Read the whole joke
213 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 Orchestra jokes
- |Q: What is the definition of a Soviet String Quartet?A: A Soviet Symphony Orchestra after a tour of...Read the whole joke
204 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Operas that never made it
- |Britten: A Midsummer Nightmare.Mozart: The Magic Tuba.Puccini: La Bamba.Rossini: The Plumber of Sev...Read the whole joke
204 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Arriving at Heaven
- |A soprano died and went to Heaven. St. Peter stopped her at the gate asking, "Well, how many false ...Read the whole joke
206 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 The amazing conductor
- |When a young hotshot conductor was making his debut at the Met, he showed the jaded and skeptical o...Read the whole joke
203 Rating:0 | Voted:0
6 This must be heaven
- |So this trumpet player dies. When he reaches is everlasting reward, the guy in the robe says, "You'...Read the whole joke
200 Rating:0 | Voted:0
7 Vocal jokes
- |Q: How do you tell when your lead singer is at the door?A: He can't find the key and doesn't know w...Read the whole joke
219 Rating:0 | Voted:0
8 Here is your punishment
- |"Haven't I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant."You have, Your ...Read the whole joke
199 Rating:0 | Voted:0
9 Contacting a friend
- |Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what lif...Read the whole joke
195 Rating:0 | Voted:0
10 The autograph book
- |Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the greenroom ...Read the whole joke
285 Rating:0 | Voted:0
11 Violin jokes
- |Q: How can you tell if a violin is out of tune?A: The bow is moving.Q: How do you make a violin sou...Read the whole joke
215 Rating:0 | Voted:0
12 The insane conductor
- |A violist comes home late at night to discover fire trucks, police cars, and a smoking crater where...Read the whole joke
180 Rating:0 | Voted:0
13 Make me a better musician
- |There once was a violist playing in the Winnipeg Symphony. He wasn't that wonderful a player, so he...Read the whole joke
214 Rating:0 | Voted:0
14 Musicians on a sinking ship
- |A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together."Help!" cried the cellist, "I can'...Read the whole joke
204 Rating:0 | Voted:0
15 Fight between the musicians
- |At a concert hall one night, the stage manager comes across an oboe player and a viola player havin...Read the whole joke
175 Rating:0 | Voted:0
16 Viola jokes
- |Q: What is a chord?A: Three violists playing in unison.Q: What is the best recording of the Walton ...Read the whole joke
220 Rating:0 | Voted:0
17 Tuba jokes
- |Q: What is the range of a tuba?A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm.Q: What's a tuba for?A: 1 1...Read the whole joke
273 Rating:0 | Voted:0
18 Trumpet jokes
- |Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Fifty. One to do it and the...Read the whole joke
296 Rating:0 | Voted:0
19 Trombone jokes
- |Q: How do you make a trombone sound like a french horn?A: Stick your hand in the bell and play lots...Read the whole joke
276 Rating:0 | Voted:0
20 Saxophone jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw?A: It's all in the grip.Q: What is the...Read the whole joke
278 Rating:0 | Voted:0
21 That was no piccolo
- |Two musicians are walking down the street, and one says to the other, "Who was that piccolo I saw y...Read the whole joke
211 Rating:0 | Voted:0
22 Piccolo joke
- |Q: How do you get 2 piccolos to play a perfect unison?A: Shoot one....Read the whole joke
211 Rating:0 | Voted:0
23 Bach in a Minuet
- |A note left for a pianist from his wifeGone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet...Read the whole joke
197 Rating:0 | Voted:0
24 Piano jokes
- |Q: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?A: A flat minor.Q: What do you get if yo...Read the whole joke
266 Rating:0 | Voted:0
25 Organ jokes
- |Q: Why are organists like a broken-winded cab horse?A: They are always longing for another stop.Q: ...Read the whole joke
185 Rating:0 | Voted:0
26 Oboe jokes
- |Q: How do you get five oboes in tune?A: Shoot four of them.Q: What are burning oboes used for?A: To...Read the whole joke
338 Rating:0 | Voted:0
27 Harpsichord jokes
- |The late Sir Thomas Beecham used to say the sound of the harpsichord is like "two skeletons making ...Read the whole joke
225 Rating:0 | Voted:0

# Title Category Hits Rating
1 French horn jokes
- |Q: What do you get when you cross a French horn player with a goal post?A: A goal post that can't m...Read the whole joke
Instrument Jokes 766 Rating:1 | Voted:3
2 Oboe jokes
- |Q: How do you get five oboes in tune?A: Shoot four of them.Q: What are burning oboes used for?A: To...Read the whole joke
Instrument Jokes 338 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Trumpet jokes
- |Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Fifty. One to do it and the...Read the whole joke
Instrument Jokes 296 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 The autograph book
- |Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the greenroom ...Read the whole joke
Instrument Jokes 285 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 Saxophone jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw?A: It's all in the grip.Q: What is the...Read the whole joke
Instrument Jokes 278 Rating:0 | Voted:0