Bar Jokes, Funny Jokes


Bar Jokes

# Title Hits Rating
1 The number twelve goes to a bar
- |A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer."Sorry I can't serve you," ...Read the whole joke		 248 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 Some very common traits in two drunks
- |A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of c...Read the whole joke		 242 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Some yogurt visits a local bar
- |Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, who was a tub of cottage cheese, says to them...Read the whole joke		 236 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Two men walked into a bar
- |Two men walked into a bar.You would think at least one of them would have ducked....Read the whole joke		 203 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 This tells me that I must be drunk
- |A man walks into a bar and orders one shot. Then he looks into his shirt pocket and orders another ...Read the whole joke		 201 Rating:0 | Voted:0
6 I only ordered a double
- |I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double.The bartender brought out a guy who looked j...Read the whole joke		 195 Rating:0 | Voted:0
7 I bet I can bite both of my eyes
- |A man walks into a bar has a few drinks and asks what his tab was. The bartender replies that it is...Read the whole joke		 199 Rating:0 | Voted:0
8 My girlfriend is out in the car
- |A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being...Read the whole joke		 189 Rating:0 | Voted:0
9 I know you were drunk yesterday
- |A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at thre...Read the whole joke		 185 Rating:0 | Voted:0
10 Bad luck finding a place to hide
- |A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands, "Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey y...Read the whole joke		 180 Rating:0 | Voted:0
11 I think I'll try a nicer approach
- |Every night, after dinner, a man took off for the local tavern. He spent the whole evening there, a...Read the whole joke		 179 Rating:0 | Voted:0
12 Someone stole things from me
- |A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen the dashboard, th...Read the whole joke		 210 Rating:0 | Voted:0
13 Who keeps saying those things?
- |A man walked in to a bar after a long day at work. As he began to drink his beer, he heard a voice ...Read the whole joke		 186 Rating:0 | Voted:0
14 A drunk orders himself a beer
- |A man walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk. he staggers up to the bar, seats h...Read the whole joke		 186 Rating:0 | Voted:0
15 Top ten signs that you are too drunk
- |10. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the Earth.9. Mosquitoes catch a buzz af...Read the whole joke		 203 Rating:0 | Voted:0
16 There is a monkey in the bar
- |A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He takes his first sip and sets it down. While he is look...Read the whole joke		 186 Rating:0 | Voted:0
17 A pirate at the local bar discusses his past
- |A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes t...Read the whole joke		 167 Rating:0 | Voted:0
18 I'm trying to prove a point
- |A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to q...Read the whole joke		 217 Rating:0 | Voted:0
19 The Beer Prayer
- |Our lager,Which art in barrels,Hollowed be thy drink.I will be drunk,At home as in the travern.Give...Read the whole joke		 191 Rating:0 | Voted:0
20 I get so drunk that I imagine things
- |The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a fr...Read the whole joke		 184 Rating:0 | Voted:0
21 Driving home very drunk
- |It seems a gentleman had too much alcohol at a party, was heading home, and was pulled over by a st...Read the whole joke		 183 Rating:0 | Voted:0
22 I'll trust you that you paid
- |A man walks into a bar and has a couple of beers. Once he is donem the bartender tells him he owes ...Read the whole joke		 179 Rating:0 | Voted:0
23 This pill allows you to fly
- |A man went into a bar in a high rise. He saw another man take a pill, take a drink, walk to the win...Read the whole joke		 205 Rating:0 | Voted:0
24 Free drinks for everyone
- |One night, a drunk comes stumbling into a bar and says to the bartender: "Drinks for all on me incl...Read the whole joke		 208 Rating:0 | Voted:0
25 Who gave you those black eyes?
- |A regular at Bob's Bar came in one evening sporting a matched pair of swollen black eyes that appea...Read the whole joke		 190 Rating:0 | Voted:0
26 If she went out with me
- |A man had been out in the back woods for weeks, cutting logs. He was a bit scruffy and didn't smell...Read the whole joke		 217 Rating:0 | Voted:0
27 The wife is not speaking to me
- |One night, this guy come into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. Then he asks for another. A...Read the whole joke		 172 Rating:0 | Voted:0

# Title Category Hits Rating
1 12 Shots
- A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender...Read the whole joke		 Bar Jokes 255 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 The number twelve goes to a bar
- |A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer."Sorry I can't serve you," ...Read the whole joke		 Bar Jokes 248 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Some very common traits in two drunks
- |A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of c...Read the whole joke		 Bar Jokes 242 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Flush
- A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling...Read the whole joke		 Bar Jokes 237 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 Some yogurt visits a local bar
- |Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, who was a tub of cottage cheese, says to them...Read the whole joke		 Bar Jokes 236 Rating:0 | Voted:0